6.05.2007

Awps

I really, really, really hate Awps.
You may not know what that is, and if you don't this rant has no meaning to you, so fuck off.

Seriously, I consider Awps to be nothing more than very poor game balancing. If a weapon is as bitched about in a game as the Awp is, then there is obviously something wrong with it. You have to listen to player input to balance a game. The players have spoken, and they say, "FUCK AWPS".
Example: Blizzard's StarCraft had spawning pools available for only 150 minerals. This caused Zerg players to be able to make a group of zerglings well before any other race could set up any defense. In patch 1.06 they upped it's cost to 200 minerals. Blizzard saw that while the 'Zerg Rush' was a perfectly honest stragety, it pissed off many, many players, and so they went in and changed it up a bit.
Valve needs to do this with the Awp. A one hit kill gun is not a balanced gun in any sense of the word. I don't think it needs to be removed, I think it needs to take more skill and patience to get kills with. Something like an unstable scope, more like if you were actually holding a sniper rifle. You'd have to actually wait to line up your shot, not just BAM DEAD.

Seriously, Valve, what the fuck were you thinking?

5.05.2007

I Rant, Therefore I Am

I hate stupid humour.
I hate that people can laugh at it, and actually find it amusing. It really just boggles my mind that people can be stupid enough to actually enjoy shows like Jackass. Maybe I'm just too intelligent to put myself in a position to emulate stupidity enough to understand where they're coming from. Being intelligent really holds you back from understanding most of society.
I listen to people talk about stuff they see that they just find histerical. I don't even get where they're coming from. People talk about clips on sites such as Break.com and everyone starts laughing; I'll just stare at them. What's funny about a guy crashing his motorcycle?
I look at that and think about how much it's going to cost for not only the hospital bills, but the cost of repairing the bike itself. I see a guy in pain, and I really don't get how that could be something to laugh at. Sure, if a guy crashes his motorcycle into an old lady, who's walker then flys into a mexican, I'll chuckle. Just a crash? Boring.
Man, it'd be cool to see that. I want to play Dominoes with people. If I was an all-powerful king, instead of playing Chess with real people, I'd play my Dominoes. Line all the people up, and use a complex system of wires and weapons to have them all die in a line. I'd make sure they were all people who enjoyed Borat!
Oh, God. I really hate Borat. It's a movie that appeals to fat boys and football players, yet I see adds for it on game sites all the time. I hate that PlayStation brought gaming to the MTV crowd. When I first got into gaming, with WarCraft, video games were for a select group of people. People who enjoyed games that could be played with the mind, instead of the body. Then PlayStation came with it's flashy commercials and MTV-based advertising. Now instead of a true gaming platform - the Wii - being the most talked about system, we get PlayStation 3 with it's MotorCross (be honest, are there any other playable games on it?).
I think I deviated. I guess in a way it requires stupid people to enjoy the PlayStation. Although, I will admit it did have some good games. I would have prefered them on the Saturn, though (Even if it did have it's problems). Seriously, can you remember when those were both at target? Sega had better graphics and better games, but of course SquareEnix just HAD to go to PlayStation. So, instead of better graphics, we got shitty aliased images that lacked NURBS (which allow for 3D curves, instead of blocks - the N64 was the only system to impliment it).
Did I mention that to make the PlayStation, Sony took not only the technology they had developed for Nintendo, but also whatever Nintendo had developed thus far?
Lovely.

-Lude

Welcome to the Ranting

I have, in my time, found the world - namely the people within it - to be completely untolerable. As such, I have decided that the best way to cope with this is to have an outlet to bitch and moan about humanity. Expect not a gothy cry baby web page, but a light-hearted view of the idiocy that dominates the social aspects of our reality.
I don'tk now how many people will read this but I hope that if anyone does they get a laugh out of it. Or they get offended, that would be nice too. I like offending, because it makes the insultee think. Well, it should.
Sometimes...people are just too stupid to understand. A lot of the time. Ok, almost all the time. Hell, we still have people whom support Hitler. The hell is up with that?
Hitler is dead! We get it, you like looking like a penis, take your shaved head and stick it somewhere warm and sticky. Like a vat of butter. Man, it'd be cool to swim in a vat of butter. I'd be like, "Mmm... cow juices! Wee!"
I like cows, they moo. They have like...four stomachs, how cool is that? I wish I had four stomachs, I could eat all the Kraft Mac & Cheese I could ever want! I'd also win every drinking contest man could conceive of, which would rock at parties. I'd be the new God of the Irish. If I could get to Ireland, which seems as though it would be pretty expensive.
Ok, I think I've rambled quite enough. Enjoy your day meatbags.

-Lude